Wow, I am not much of a blogger, per say, but I have spent a good portion of the last three days lurking around hairtell, and I have read my same sad story so many times...so I feel like I have strength now to write this for so many reasons. If I "get it out" it will be easier to deal with, someone else who's struggling with the same things may draw some comfort, and anyone who is reading this who is clueless might just see the heart of a woman who is suffering from this painful predicament.

I was at my friend's last week and she was sitting a little boy from church, I think he's about 6 now, and when he saw me, he said >loudly< "Hey, uh, you're growing a mustache!" I instantly realled being at another woman's house when her 8 year old son cocked his head sideways and said, "COOL! You're growing a mustache!" Wow....I wanted to tell these kids, "Yeah, I know, that's actually one thing that I have been aware of 24 hours a day, 7 days a week since I was about 8 or 9 years old".

But I don't say anything. Instead I let the mommies or the babysitters scold the child, saying, "That's not nice!" or "Don't say that!", which I really think just makes it worse, making a huge deal out of it to the kid, which causes it to stick in their mind even more and drawing even more attention to it.

So, everytime I am in PUBLIC, I am on the offensive. I am thinking, is she looking at it? Is he looking away because he noticed it? Are they unnaturally facinated with the dark, discolored razor stubble streaking across my upper lip? Do people touch themselves there when they talk to me because they are trying to signal me to wipe off the dark smudge? Or is it simply a subconscious reaction? Or are they doing it to signal to me that they DO see it? ~suprise! the man in the moon can see it! HA! I don't believe you mom, husband, sister, friend, co-worker, etc. when you tell me that it's hardly noticeable!~ And every month or two there is the random person who MENTIONS IT "OUT LOUD" IN A PUBLIC SETTING!!!!

In the event that this person doing the pointing out of the oh-so-obvious is a child, I can understand they truly have NO IDEA how totally devestated this makes me, but when it's another adult, I instantly have very unkind thoughts about them, but always ultimately those thoughts are about myself.

I feel like a FREAK, a MONSTER, a MISFIT, a CIRCUS ACT, a SIDESHOW, an ANIMAL.... And I know this is untrue. I am a very strong christian warrior, and I know what God says about me: I am fearfully and wonderfully made, He sees a princess before Him, destined to sit on a throne in His kingdom, a beautiful, skillfully made work of beauty pieced together and HANDMADE my the Master Himself (which, btw, isn't just about me but every single human on this earth, wheather you believe it or not), and I strive to live in that truth....however reality snatches me from those heavenly realms every single morning when shave my face. Or if I catch a look at myself around 2:00 pm and see the hair is already aggressively growing back, or in the evening when I think about HAIR HAIR HAIR all night, reading blog after blog after blog and obsessing about what I should do.

So, today, I did something. I called a qualified electrologist. I scheduled a consultaion. I cringed at the thought of $4.00 a gallon gas to drive the 205 mile round-trip to the ONLY electrologist in my area. I wonder which will cost me more? The gas or the treatments??? ---insane cackling laugh---

So, thanks so much for letting me get all of that out. Wow! I DO feel better! I think there might be something to this blogging stuff.....

Loved your post!!! It made me lol!!!

Those electrolysis treatments will be totally worth it!

i've never had a facial hair problem but i have hair issues in other places. i feel for you.

your electrolysis appointments will be worth it. i have my consultation soon (thursday july 10) and i feel better about my situation already just because i have made a step towards a permanant solution.

you seem like a very strong person...you handle yourself well even though i know you are under severe stress due to this if you are anything like me.

just think of it this way...anyone worth having in your life...wont see a mustache when they look at you...they will see kind eyes above it and a pretty smile below it. what use is a person who cant look past a patch of hair?

i hope electro goes well for you! if you need anyone to talk to message me because we will both be going through electro soon.

-brandi lee-

Wow...I am having some serious depression today. I didn't shave today, and won't tomorrow, so my electrologist will have something to grab onto for my appointment tomorrow afternoon. I hate days like this. I feel so ugly. I am also having a really hard time NOT plucking. I am scared to even do some maintenance on my eyebrows because being in that oh-so-familiar position, armed with my favorite weapon, I can't trust myself NOT to pull the 100 or so black, coarse hairs sprouting out of my chin.
I am so sick of this S***!!! I am just ready to be done with it and I am only on appointment #2. I will drive longer than my treatment. That really sucks. Plus, I won't be able to stop anywhere on the way, looking like a hairy monster, or on the way home, looking like a jellyfish stung me on my face. It would be nice to be able to do errands at the same time. I should just say "so what...I don't care what anyone thinks of me...." But that is so hard. I know it's so obvious, literally spread all over my face.
OK, I'm done whining. Now I'm gonna put on my big girl panties and deal with it.
Thanx for listening, Hairtell.

Buy witch hazel and make sure to apply it afterwards. Redness or any sign of treatment should be almost gone by the time you get home after your treatment.

You should never see yourself as ugly. I can see that you are strong just by writing about yourself here - that your are not afraid and ashamed of yourself.

I hope your treatment goes well for you...

Hey that’s a nice post, I learned a lot from it. Thanks!
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rocky
Addiction Recovery New mexico

I need to put this on here....
I am experiencing great freedom, happiness and joy as a result of getting electrolysis. I am having much less hair, very light shadow and most importantly....NO MORE RAZOR BURN!!!!
My face looks great, and I get compliments on my complexion, with NO MAKEUP, which is a miracle! I never used to leave my house without makeup, especially if I hadn't shaved that day, but now I can. I had my 3rd treatment 9 days ago and have only shaved TWICE since then, and I used to shave at least once a day. This is doing amazing things to my self-esteem!
PTL!

That's great to hear imosm, I'm very happy for you. How is it going right now?