To be honest with you, I don't think there is anything you can do to make your hair softer to a degree that you would be happy with. I know, I've been there. I trim my legs and arms with a 1.5 trimmer, but the stubble isn't much of an issue. Especially on my legs. If you are worried about the appearance you could always bleach it blonde, but it's still going to be stubbly.
You can try tend skin for the ingrowns, but it really doesn't help that much, especially not enough to warrant the price. I'd go with something permanent bro. I actually had decent results with a GENTLElase laser on that area, and I had bad results everywhere else with a laser. Most people can get decent results on the chest and stomach areas. Might want to look into it. You could even try electrolysis to clear the area once and it would probably remove some of it and make what came back finer.
300 Estimated Hours of Electrolysis Needed.
58 Estimated Hours of Electrolysis Left.